Jokie

Subject: Sports Quotes

1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I
> > wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan' all the
> > kids to copulate
> > me."
> >
> > 2. New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming
> > season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."
> >
> > 3. Upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skins say: "I'd run over my own
> > mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To
> > win, I'd run over Joe's mom, too."
> >
> > 4. Torrin Polk,
> > University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He
> > treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings."
> >
> > 5. Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann, 1996:
> > "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy
> > like Norman Einstein."
> >
> > 6. Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I'm
> > going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." (now that
> > is beautiful)
> >
> > 7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up
> > alphabetically by height." And, "You guys pair up in groups of
> > three, and then line up in a circle."
> >
> > 8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: "Why
> > would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for
> > three years, not Princeton."
> >
> > 9. Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he
> > keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so when I
> > forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."
> >
> > 10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime
of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the
> > morning regardless of what time it is."
> >
> > 11. Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining
to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My
> > sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an
> > uncle or an aunt."
> >
> > 12. Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player: "I told
> > him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said,
'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'"
> >
> > 13. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what
> > he told a player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks to me
> > like you're spending too much time on one subject."
> >
> > 14. Amarillo High School and Oiler coach Bum Phillips when asked by
> > Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips
> > responded: "Because she is too damn ugly to kiss good-bye."
> >
> > 15. Michael Vick, Atlanta Falcons quarterback, on the secret of his
> > success: "I have two weapons - my legs, my arm and my brains."